Your Cheating Heart

This is what one man wrote about why he "cheats" on his wife:

Thanks for sharing about your addiction. I understand addictions since I just gave up cigarettes (again) for new years. What I personally don't like about addictions is that I am not in control of what I do. That is the worst part. I prefer to do things when, and because I want to do them -- not because I have to. So I understand your sentiment, like I used to say -- someday I need to deal with quitting smoking. It's not the same exactly, but similar in some ways.

I'll be glad to talk about why I have affairs, but it's a big topic, and I "m outta time right now. Hopefully I'll write more tomorrow. The quick version is: I have some needs that my wife doesn't meet such as 1) Being touched 2) Having sex. So I look elsewhere to fill the needs. I haven't seen my mistress in 3 days and will look forward to seeing her tomorrow. ...

The following is my response:

This man does not believe in God, but he does believe in himself. I was the same.

In his mind, life is forever. But it is a twisted view of forever. Instead of thinking that forever means what he does in this world reverberates through eternity, he thinks that he has forever before he can make up his mind to stop doing what he knows is wrong.

This is the root of a lie that defines his life. It is the sin that he cannot wipe out.

He thinks that his life is sound because it is based on logic. He has needs. His wife does not meet them. Therefore, he goes and finds another way to meet them. He wants to be in control. But with his cigarette problem, he admits that he is not in control.

If he stared at himself in the mirror, he would realize that if there is a God, his logic is flawed, and his whole life will be exposed as a sham.

This reminds me of those men who went to hell and reported back what they experienced on "To Hell and Back". They all admitted that they lived very selfishly. They all knew that this "darkness" or "fire" that they experienced was hell. And furthermore, that each and every one of these men understood without question that they fully deserved it.

This man is ultimately a cruel man. Sin is cruel. Satan is cruel.

He does not even try to see it from his wife's point of view.

The lies that he is living, he thinks he has hermetically sealed off from her. He thinks that none of the stench of his lies makes its way to her nostrils.

But women are not stupid. They have much better nostrils then men.

Women, however, can live lies also. It is a form of sin, too. She probably knows that he has cheated on her for many years. She may even subconsciously approve of it.

What series of twists and turns happened to create a marriage so broken? Is it God's fault? Or is it the fault of at least one very selfish individual?

I think if he said that his wife knows and approves all about his "cheating" then it would be a different story. But then again, it wouldn't be "cheating."

Its only "cheating" because he knows that its morally wrong. And what does morally wrong mean? It means nothing unless it means that its against God's will.

Selfishness is the nature of sin. Love is the nature of God.

The two cannot abide together in harmony in the same human heart.

Its funny that he realizes that he needs to quit smoking because it is bad and will ultimately kill him. When will he realize that sin will kill him too? Either way you cut it, death is forever.

Eternal life is only through Christ.

Praise Him!